forgiveForgiving others can be difficult. For David, forgiving himself has been even harder.

David is a Crossroad Bible Institute student and prisoner in a Tennessee facility. In his Bible lessons and letters from CBI Instructors, he has learned about God’s forgiveness.

“I am saved, I know I am, but I am also the hardest judge of myself as well,” David said. “I have heard the hardest person to ever forgive is yourself and the devil feeds on that self-loathing and condemnation.”

David says he has repented of his past sins and understands that God has forgiven him. He has read Bible verses like 1 John 1:9 that says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Yet David’s past continues to haunt him, and forgiving himself is a process, he says.

“I do understand that God has forgiven me. I will forgive myself over time. I know God is working on me in this area,” he said. “I have days when I don’t think about those actions that landed me in jail, and then I have days when I can’t think of anything else.”

David says prayer, studying Scripture and seeking guidance and encouragement from his CBI Instructors have helped with the process of moving on from his past.

Here is a poem David sent to CBI about his struggles:

Oh, these rantings inside my head
How they plague me every day
How they haunt me in my dreams
How they pester me in every way

Oh, these rantings inside my head
How I wish they would just cease
How they twist memories from my past
How they rob me of my peace

Oh, these rantings inside my head
How I struggle and never win
How I fall and fall each day
How I failed over and over again

Oh, these rantings inside my head
How I lay my struggles at Your feet
How I pray for Your light to pierce the darkness
How Your love lifts me from defeat

Oh, these rantings inside my head
How they are nothing more than a thought
How I willingly submit them to You
How You saved me and by Your blood I am bought

Please pray for David and other prisoners struggling to forgive themselves as they serve their sentences.